Margaret Thatcher told Woman's Own about ten years ago that it didn't exist but no one took much notice and

Margaret Thatcher told Woman's Own about ten years ago that it didn't exist, but no one took much notice, and people still go on talking about it; but they usually feel the need to attach some adjective to it, such as acquisitive or affluent, or even high I'm not sure what the Mandelson adjective would be Multicultural probably. PETER MANDELSON has told the Daily Telegraph that he hopes the Millennium Dome will make people "reflect on who we are and what sort of society we live in". They could start by reflecting on what Mr Mandelson thinks he means by society. "I am a grown-up now and I have taken responsibility for my life.

The only way you know if a childhood has been successful is when that child grows up and has children of their own."Oasis, Dan y Graig Cottage, Balaclava Road, Glais, Swansea SA7 9HJ. I have met incredible adoptive parents who have persevered in the face of overwhelming difficulties, and when it works it can be inspiring and wonderful." He would prefer to see same- race placements for children, "but not all trans-racial placements are bad in the same way that not all same-race placements are good."For the young Bosnian, Romanian, Latin American and Chinese children that have been adopted here since the early Nineties, it is too soon to say how things will turn out, said Mr Mallows. "We have to celebrate differences, not ignore them, and recognise the adult-in-the-making in each child. "It is very important for adoptive parents to be prepared for a day when their sweet four-year-old goes off to school angelically, and comes back saying 'I hate you because I'm black'. One nine-year-old said to me 'I get racism in the street, then I get home and see white faces and I love them - I don't know what to do'."Adoptive parents must recognise, says Mr Mallows, that love is not enough.

"If they have good emotional solidity behind them they should come through. If you deny your humanitarian instincts over this issue, I don't see how you can retain your humanity."Michael Mallows, a 53-year-old psychotherapist and a trans-racial adoptee himself, has worked for 12 years with trans-racial adoptees. He is now drawing up a programme for Barnardo's to help prospective adoptive parents "Family life is a lottery Some families work, some don't," he says. Liv O'Hanlon, an adoptive parent herself who directs the Adoption Forum, has little patience with opponents of intercountry adoption. "Adoption is a fundamentally human reaction to the terrible plights that some children find themselves in, and most inter-country adopters adopt the country and culture along with the child." Adolescence, she adds, is a difficult time for all children. Michael Nicholson, the foreign correspondent whose story was made into a film when he smuggled a Bosnian orphan, Natasha Mihaljcic, out of Sarajevo, said "There is no culture in death" when it was suggested that he had snatched the little girl from her roots. This is partly because adoption is currently out of favour with social workers, who prefer, where possible, not to separate children from their birth families.An overhaul of the system has been long-promised by the government, and last week first reports appeared about a weighty document to be published by the Institute of Economic Affairs, containing independent research that shows adoption is better for children than either care homes or fostering.At the same time, the Adoption Forum and the Campaign for Inter-Country Adoption are lobbying for a single, independent authority to govern the policy and practice of adoption, whether from within the UK or from abroad, to make it faster and simpler; last week, they submitted a discussion paper to the government's Health Committee.Despite the obstructions, the pity and the horror inspired by the fate of individual children is a powerful factor in parents' determination to adopt from abroad.

"We must be cautious about claiming success," he says, "because it is early days yet, but it is very unfortunate for adopters when they are given the impression that they are somehow doing wrong. Peter Selman, head of the department of social policy at Newcastle University, said: "It is my understanding that the report will show that breakdown rates in these adoptions are very low - lower than the breakdown rates for British families that adopt British-born children."Research in Norway and Sweden, he added, has also been generally positive, though studies do show evidence of adolescent identity crises. Think of what it costs to raise a British child - enough to keep several families in the Third World for years. I think adopting parents are misled - they don't know the consequences of trans-racial adoption and are often left in isolation to deal with this."WHAT little research exists on the long-term effects of inter-country and trans-racial adoption does not always bear out Ms Tullar's pessimism. A survey of Romanian children at four and six, commissioned by the Department of Health, is to be published shortly. "One of the consequences of cultural dispossession for adolescents or young adults can be anger, which can make them go off the rails."Ms Tullar believes these adoptions are motivated as much by the parents' needs as the children's, and that this can make them morally suspect: "When there are so many needy children in this country and so many parents who need support, why do people feel the need to look abroad? If children abroad are in trouble, the way to help is to send aid and money - if people were to put the time and effort they put into taking out one child into helping a local orphanage it would be far more effective.

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